My interview with a Female






I recently had the distinct privilege of interviewing a member of the female sex, it was a rather enlightening moment in my life, for she revealed many things that I did not know about women.
Here is the interview reprinted in it's entirety:

Goggins: So what's up?
Female: Nothing much!

(awkward silence)

Goggins: So....uh.......yeah....ummm do you like football?
Female: Not really! I'm not into sports.
Goggins: Oh, well, neither am I.

(awkward silence)

Goggins: So what are you into?
Female: I like music. I'm currently the lead singer in a punk band.
Goggins: Oh, what's the name of your band?
Female: The Virginal Vixens!
Goggins: Wow, that's sounds awesome.
Female: Yeah, we're playing at Combustible Diner this weekend. It's a coffeehouse in Milwaukee.
Goggins: Oh really, maybe I will attend.
Female: You should come, it will be loads of ufn.
Goggins: Yeah.........

(awkward silence)

Goggins: Do you have a boyfriend?
Female: No.
Goggins: Can I interest you in a movie?
Female: Sure, why not?
Goggins: YESSSSSS!
Female: Can I bring my girlfriends, they really want to see Harry Potter?
Goggins: Uhhhhhhh..............sure, I guess.
Female: Oh joy, this will be a good time.
Goggins: Yeah, it will be great.
Female: Well, I got to go. It will nice talking to you Mr. Gogans. Bye!
Goggins: Bye!

That is how my interview went. The next day I saw Harry Potter with the women and her lady friends, they talked incessantly through out the movie, but not loud enough so I could hear them. Every time, they suspected I was listening (which I wasn't) they would stop their conversation for a second and watch the movie. When they felt the coast was clear, they would start talking again. The movie thankfully ended and we all said their goodbyes, the female promised she would call me with in a week. She hasn't call me yet. However, at least she was courteous enough to apologize after accidentally spilling Pepsi on my pants. That was by far the most pleasant moment I've ever had with a woman.