You need to dump her!
I need to talk to you about your girlfriend. She's annoying; she's like Jar Jar Binks, every time she opens her mouth she kills the moment. You need to dump her! Not only for your own good, but for the good of the group as well. Your girlfriend does not belong in our group and if you remain with her, then I'm afraid we can not keep you as a friend. I'm sorry, but it's kind of hard to separate you from your annoying girlfriend's stupid antics. Therefore, you must decide as to whether you want to stay with her or us! It's your choice! However, let it be said that if you choose to stay with her, you choose a life of misery. EW! The only thing she has going for her is a nice rack, other than that she's utterly useless. If you choose to stay with your friends, you choose a life of fun and excitement. You choose a life of drunken parties, video games, fastfood, and other hilarious shenanigans. Don't let this she demon wear you down. EW!