I'm sooooo psyched for Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End.

OH MY GOD, only three and a half weeks until Pirates of the Caribben: At World's End comes out, I am so excited. I just can't wait to see what wacky adventures Jack Sparrow gets himself into this time. Johnny Depp is soooo HAWT! I sure hope him and Keira Knightley hook up in this movie, I mean as hot as Orlando Bloom may be, he is not Johnny Depp....er... I mean Jack Sparrow. I can't wait to see what role Captain Barbossa will play in this movie. I was shocked...shocked I say, when he appeared at the very end of Dead Men's Chest with that hilarious monkey on his shoulder and that apple in his hand. I was sooo delighted to see him that I applauded. I wonder if he's going to be a good guy in At World's End or return to his villainous ways? Delightful! Not since the Lord of the Rings trilogy has a film franchise made me so horny. I remember I had to control my masturbatory urges when Jack Sparrow made his entrance in Dead Man's Chest. It reminded me of the time in The Two Towers when Legolas surfed down the steps at Helm' s Deep on a shield, while firing arrows at the enemy. That moment kicked ass! Damn, I now have a stronge urge for some Burger King. I think I hear my glow in the dark Lord of the Rings glass goblet calling out to me. It's saying, "Fill me with Dr. Pepper!" Don't worry my faithful goblet you are not to behold, you are to be held. Haw Haw! That commercial was delightful. Where was I again?
As for Spider-Man 3, that movie looks gay. Tobey Maguire is simply not hot. The Spider-Man trilogy would have been so much better had Johnny Depp played the title role. Just imagine all the delightful antics and adlibs Johnny Depp would have come up with had he played Peter Parker. They also should have cast Orlando Bloom as Harry Osborne and Keira Knightley as Mary Jane Watson. That would be bad ass, just like Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle. All I know is that come May 25th, I will be the first in line to see Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest.

OH MY GOD......Shrek 3 is coming out May 18. Oh this going to be a great May. The Shrek films are so delightful, especially when they throw in random pop-culture references, top 10 hit songs, and fart jokes. I totally loved how in the first Shrek they used the much loved Smash Mouth song "All Star" on the soundtrack when Shrek is getting ready for the day. I laughed so hard. OMG! However, I must confess that as good as the Shrek films are, they would have been so much better had Johnny Depp done the voice for the lead role. I love Johnny Depp. I wish he would dump that bitch of a wife and marry me. Johnny, if you're out there, I'm waiting for you. LOL! LMAO! ROFL! WTF! JEOMK!