Steal candy from babies is not as easy as it used to be!

I remember the good old days, when all one had to do to steal candy from a baby was walked up to his/her stroller, push the mother aside and take the candy away from the helpless baby. Now, things are completely different. Yesterday, I spotted my a prey, it was little helpless baby with a huge lollipop in his right hand. He was dressed entirely in blue and had a huge smile on his face, I thought, "Ha Ha! This will be an easy task! Ha Ha! I will have candy tonight." As I approached the baby's stroller, his mother step out and told me to stop. I said, "What are you going to do about it, woman?" Cause as well all know, hysterical women are no match for tough, macho men such as myself. Just then she pulled out a can of pepper spray, sprayed me in the eyes, and cock punched me twelve times. I fell to the ground screaming, she then pulled out a crow bar and bashed in my knee caps, and the rolled the stroller over my head four times. She walked away laughing, while I all bloodied up, realized that I had been defeated by an inferior women. I decided later on that day to change my name and move out of state. I then theorized that this woman wasn't a woman, but a man in drag, who makes it his goal to thwart candy snatchers such as myself. This made me feel a little better and I decided that I would stay in the candy snatching business.